Infinite Jeffs

I¹ wrote² a bestselling³ book⁴ and you can buy⁵ it on Amazon⁶!

¹ With the assistance of a Python script that replaced every one of the ~550,000 words in Infinite Jest with “Jeff,” while preserving punctuation, line breaks, etc.

² I did not technically write every word, but I did teach myself Adobe InDesign to recreate the Infinite Jest cover and interior layout after my friend Patrick Baker said the words, "there should be infinite Jeffs" in reference to my cat, Jeff.

³ In May 2026, a month after creating Infinite Jeffs as a one-off gift for my writing partner Graham's 40th birthday, a guy in Texas found the Amazon listing and posted it on X. The post got 1.1 million views, and I was contacted by the AV Club who ran an article about my incredibly dumb bit. Since then, I've sold over 750 copies in ten countries. The book was briefly the #11 Amazon bestseller in "Contemporary Literature & Fiction," beating Sylvia Plath and Gabriel García Márquez, which is pure insanity.

⁴ Though it is evident to me that this is, in fact, a book, Kindle Direct Publishing initially rejected it as “low-content.” After hours of back and forth with Amazon representatives about the semantic substance of Infinite Jeffs, they agreed it qualified as Literary Fiction. I spent many more hours emailing with different representatives arguing that the title needed to bleed off the cover to mirror the original work, but this battle was lost.

⁵ While you can buy it, you probably don’t need to. I've mailed dozens to internet strangers and left more in little libraries around LA. I have too many copies and will almost certainly give you one for free if you ask.

⁶ I don’t feel good about publishing on Amazon, but it was by far the cheapest way to print even one custom book, and I’d already spent a ton of time and money on this incredibly dumb bit.